What if I'm publicly shamed?

Episode Description:

In this week’s episode of What If For Authors, we tackle a difficult topic—public shaming. Claire dives into what happens when authors, as public figures, find themselves the target of online attacks or social media pile-ons. She shares practical steps for managing a shame campaign, from getting offline and regulating your emotions to deciding whether you need to bring in a crisis manager. But beyond the tactical approach, this episode digs deep into what shame really is, how it works, and how to transform toxic emotions into tools for growth and self-compassion. Whether you're worried about an angry reviewer or facing criticism that seems to come out of nowhere, this episode equips you to handle public shaming with resilience and grace.

Key Takeaways:

• Understanding Shame vs. Guilt: Claire distinguishes between shame, which tells us that we are bad, and guilt, which tells us we did something bad. Understanding the difference is crucial to not letting shame control our responses.
• Practical Steps During a Crisis: Claire outlines what to do if you find yourself the subject of online shaming—step one is to get offline, regulate your emotions, and refrain from engaging. 
• The Role of Empathy in Combatting Shame: Shame isolates, making us feel undeserving of support and empathy. The antidote? Finding a safe, empathetic person to share your feelings with. Expressing your shame helps release its grip and restore a sense of connection.
• How Each Enneagram Type Handles Shame: Although Enneagram Types 2, 3, and 4 are in the “shame triad,” every type has a unique relationship with shame. Claire explains how recognizing these patterns can help lessen the hold shame has on your life and career.
• Why Self-Compassion is Key: The ultimate goal is to embrace the fact that while good people can do bad things, it doesn’t make them unworthy of love and connection. Self-compassion and honest reflection allow us to experience guilt without spiraling into toxic shame.

Why You Should Listen: If you’re an author who has ever worried about a bad review, social media backlash, or being misunderstood publicly, this episode is a must-listen. Claire’s candid discussion of how shame affects us at a fundamental human level and her practical advice on what to do when you’re feeling attacked will help you build resilience, develop self-awareness, and prepare for the inevitable challenges of being a public figure.

Join the Conversation: Have you ever faced public shaming or harsh criticism? Share your experiences and strategies with Claire by emailing her at contact@ffs.media. If you need support, Claire is there to offer empathy and guidance as you work through these complex emotions.

Access the transcript here.

Happy Writing!